Sometimes we lose it.
We try and try to be strong.
Strong for our friends.
Strong for our family.
Strong for strangers even.
Occasionally strong for ourselves.
Until one day we aren’t. We lose it. We crumble under the weight we were carrying. Then we feel weak. We stop recognizing all the strength we had and only see the weakness we displayed.
Have you ever watched the world strongest man competitions? I’ve seen them from time to time flipping through channels or when one of the men in my life are watching. I don’t really know a whole lot about it or any body building for that matter. But here’s what I do know. When I see someone deadlift 350lbs, and lets just say they lift it 5 times and drop it on the 6th, and then they are no longer able to continue. I marvel in their strength. I am always in awe of their ability not their lack of ability. In fact they all at some point can no longer lift that same 350 lbs. In no way whatsoever would I even for a second consider that person weak because on the sixth attempt they couldn’t go any further. Even if they typically do more than 6 on the regular. No matter how strong the body builder, there comes a point where the weight becomes a struggle and eventually they just can’t do it any longer. When I see this I don't think they are weak. I still marvel in their strength. Are you with me on this?
Sometimes the weight we carry becomes a struggle until we no longer can lift it. And then, we lose it. We lose our patience, lose our temper, lose our strength in the moment. We yell at our spouse or other people we love. Maybe we dive into a half gallon of moose tracks ice cream or completely break down and cry. Then, we shame ourselves for what we have done. Pointing out to ourselves how weak we are. Not once do we stop to look at the strength we've had for the weight we’ve been carrying. We don’t stop to think about all the work we have done to increase our strength so that we were able to carry more now than we ever have in the past.
No we look only at our weakness. That momentary lapse in time.
We pile shame, guilt and blame onto that brief moment.
That moment we were simply tired and worn.
When really, we can choose to look at the load we were carrying and marvel in the strength we’ve had to come this far. We can replace shame, guilt and blame with compassion, grace and rest. When we do this, we’ll actually find we’ll produce more strength and lighten our load a bit.
We’ll recover faster and lose it much less often.
But how do we do this in a way that is effective and not pretend resting. (You know the kind. The laying in bed or on the couch for hours on the weekend calling it rest but really it’s ruminating and feeling sorry for ourselves.) Or doing the “I’ve had it hard I deserve ice cream” kind of way?
We learn to manage our mind. That’s it. That’s the all it takes. It sounds simple but it isn't an easy feat. Learning to manage your mind takes work. It’s hard sometimes. But totally doable. Especially when you have the right tools to help. And it is so worth it. Are you not quite sure how ? That’s were you reach out to a life coach. They will teach you. They will give you amazing tools to use and show you how to use them so you can get stronger and lighten the load you carry.
Love you madly.
Leslie
P.S. If you are ready for a coach to help you with this or you just have a question email me right now at leslie.canup@gmail.com and I will show you where to start.
