The Structure We Must Place On The Foundation

So there’s something I must tell you. 

If you've been reading along with me as I've been posting then you know about the foundation for my coaching. That I believe the foundation for everything is for you to know you are 100% loveable. ( If your new here stop reading this right now and click here to go back to the very beginning. You can come right back but you must start there! )

While that is the foundation, this is the structure on which all other things should be built around. Are you ready for it? 
Here goes…

Not only are you 100% loveable, but so is every other person you know. And every person you don’t know that lives on this planet. They are. 
Even the ones you don’t like. Even the ones you have trouble with. 
They are 100% loveable. 

I want you to imagine for just a moment what it might be like to be them and read my very first post. Think for a moment how it felt for you to know those words were written for you, what that might feel like for them to know those words were written for them. 

When you think of that person and their lovability you may think about all the things they do wrong or don’t do well is what determines how loveable they are. But it’s not. They are 100% loveable all the time no matter what. But really the thing which determines how much you love them is your ability to love. 

Here me out on this. When we have genuine unconditional love for someone we can love them no matter who they are or what they have done. We can have compassion for them even when they aren’t doing a very good job. 

Having unconditional love for someone does not mean that we are condoning anything. Sometimes love says no. When love says no it is love, not anger, not resentment, not hate. 

I love the example of a child wanting candy for dinner. You don’t tell him no because you are angry, resent him or hate him. You tell him know because you know it is not good for them. It’s not good for fuel for their body. They need something healthy instead. 

It’s the same thing for loving others. We can love them unconditionally and still say no to them. Still set boundaries. Still choose to put space between us and them. 

It is so much better when it is done from a place of love. 

People say love hurts. I use to think that too. Until I learned love never hurts. It’s the absence of love that hurts. 

So yea, that person, that one you are struggling with, they are 100% loveable. There is nothing that can change that. If you aren’t able to love them well, that is because your ability to love is limited. I know this can be a very hard concept to really grab ahold of. But when we are willing to work at it everything opens up for us. Then the choices we make today will still be good for all of our tomorrows.

Love you madly.

Leslie

P.S. Need help loving the unlovable? Lets chat. Email me at leslie.canup@gmail.com.